True love never dies. Mortal love, grounded in ego and lust, dies every day, only to be reborn until we learn the lessons love has to bring us. Thich Nhat Hahn teaches us that true love helps you to suffer less and helps the other person to suffer less. True love makes you happy and makes the other person happy. True love brings you more freedom. He teaches that the Buddha has expounded upon four elements of true love:
- Maitreya – Loving Kindness: The power to offer happiness and joy to yourself is true love. If you can help another generate love and joy that is true love. If you are a true lover you have great happiness for you and him or her. There are many conditions of happiness and joy that are already available, a true lover dwells in those places. Where there is true love there is always happiness for you and for the other person.
- Karuna – Compassion: The ability to make yourself suffer less and to help the other person suffer less. There is an art to suffering and if we know how to suffer we suffer much less. Compassion is helping the other person to suffer less.
- Mudita – Joy: If love doesn’t have joy it is not true love. If love makes the other person cry every day, that is not true love. True love is capable of generating joy for yourself and for the other person.
- Upeksha – Inclusiveness: In true love there is no space between the one who loves and the one who is loved. In true love your suffering is her suffering, your happiness is her happiness there is no individual suffering or happiness anymore.
In true love your love is unlimited and it continues to grow until it embraces everyone in the cosmos. Allow what is to be and trust that whatever is arising is an opportunity for true love to emerge and deepen in ways that you have never experienced before!
Loving What Is
Loving what is requires that you embrace change. It is simply the practice of witnessing whatever arises in each moment, whatever life presents us with, meeting it with love.
Every moment in life is here to teach us how to love more deeply than in the last. You can flow with love between many experiences with ease. It is when you allow fear to enter your mind that it becomes challenging to flow in life. Love lubricates everything, it helps all run more smoothly.
Loving what is, is a mindful practice. I recently read, and reread, and reread again the book, Whatever Arises, Love That. Matt Kahn presents a powerful method that reminds me of a Buddhist teaching I practiced several years ago. In this practice you simply allow everything your eyes fall upon and then say, ‘I love you’. As you walk outside and look up at the sky, say, ‘I love you’, as you see your cat, the stranger walking in the street, say silently in your mind toward them, ‘I love you’. This has been a powerful daily practice for me to remind myself that I am the center of all of the love that ever is and ever will be. I only need to express that love in order to feel and receive it.
Loving what is requires patience. What is may not always be what you want it to be. So the practice is to simply accept what is. Emotional tranquility brings clarity. With clarity you can take action with confidence & be decisive. Loving what is also requires us to be vigilant in aligning all of our verbal commitments with action. You must love and honor yourself deeply first in order to be able to fully love whatever arises in others. As you love what is, inspired moments arise often. Acting on inspired ideas and remembering that every moment is new helps to release old ways of thinking and keeps your mind always open to a new perspective. Loving what is allows you to rise above seeming problems and to witness all that is not love as a call for love.
Loving what is inspires you to follow your intuition. It opens your mind and brings mental, emotional, physical & spiritual transformation! Take regular time to be alone, release all limitations and dwell upon the transcendent. As you continue to take regular time to practice you embody transcendent states of being. Patience is your greatest ally everyday.
Loving what is requires forgiving yourself for all perceived weakness that you experience and forgive others for what they were unable to give and for any pain you experienced. Move forward in the light with a forgiving and open heart each moment an opportunity for transformation as you love what is.
Why Do We Need to Experience Pain or Fight?
Mortal love is not meant to last forever, and pain can do much to sever the bonds that we make as humans loving that keep us together. This is because we can still feel a strong pull to those that hurt us who we love. Even when we are being abused, we can still reach out and seek and express love. It speaks to our ability to love in the face of the deepest pain. This kind of love transcends mortal love, this true love is spiritual in nature and free from the pain caused by the egoic mind.
You have to allow yourself to surrender to the currents that are running through your life; all feelings have a place as they serve the greater good that is always unfolding. In the Bhagavad Gita, the text in which Krishna brings his wisdom down to earth, we are taught of the nature of the universe and the necessity to flow with it. Krishna speaks to one of his disciples who did not want to fight in battle, Arjuna, who I can totally relate to, he just wanted peace and saw no point in fighting. Krishna tells him that he may as well participate in the fight, for he has been led to it and even if he stopped fighting, death would occur in another way, for time destroys all things. He says to Arjuna,
‘Therefore get up and prepare to fight. After conquering your enemies you will enjoy a flourishing kingdom. They are already put to death by My arrangement, and you, can be but an instrument in the fight.’
He tells Arjuna to just become an instrument, that the entire world is moving according to the plan of God, for all souls to return to God. This wisdom helps to love what is. We have to first release the idea that we actually have control over what is happening. Second, we have to surrender to the flow of energy that is moving through us.
When we cling too tightly to anything, when we believe that anything on the outside is a validation of what is within us, we give away our power. Sometimes we are presented with a fight, at other times there is death. It is all an opportunity to accept what is, to love all that has not been loved and for true love to bloom in every area of your life.
This post is an excerpt from my next book, Think Love, Speak Love, be Love: The path to Transcendent Health. You can read more from this book by clicking the link at the top of this post. Also, did you know, I published my first book, Chakra Healing for Transcendent Health as a Kindle Book on Amazon! You can read a sample here 🙂